


Do you know what you've left behind?

by charming_cinnamon_rolls



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Female Pidge | Katie Holt, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Galaxy Garrison, Gen, Good, Kerberos Mission, Pidge | Katie Holt Angst, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Post-Kerberos Mission, Yes yes, i hate them, i love my children, therefore they must suffer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 10:34:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11872524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charming_cinnamon_rolls/pseuds/charming_cinnamon_rolls
Summary: “Hey, Katie! Do you know Takashi Shirogane?” asked Will Davis.“Yeah,” Katie said, throwing Dan a pleading look.“R.I.P,” Dan said loud enough so only Katie could hear.“Wow! That’s so cool!” Mitchell Gray said as he exchanged excited glances with Will. “What is he like?”“A bit of a loser, really.”------------In which Katie roasts Shiro before discovering the fate of the Kerberos Mission. (Pidge origins)





	Do you know what you've left behind?

**Author's Note:**

> heya pal
> 
> Disclaimer: if you are triggered by the French language, you have been warned

“Katie, wake up. You are going to be late for school.”

 

 The soft morning glow illuminated the pastel-colored room, irradiating warmth in orange tones. The room itself had light blue walls, almost entirely covered in posters--  _ Star Wars,  _ Slytherin, vintage NASA merchandise collected over the years-- and pictures. Chairs were hidden under mounds of clothes, clean and dirty, the floor was cluttered with shoes and socks. The only organized space in the room was the desk, made from reclaimed wood by an overly excited father years ago. An open laptop, color-coded markers and colored pencils, carefully wrapped cables, and a brand-new notepad. Above the desk, a string of fairy lights, which were rarely ever used, but kept solely for the aesthetic. The desk was Katie’s sacred place. She usually spent hours before it: working, inventing, thinking, researching, learning. Sometimes, she just sat there, doing nothing at all, letting her mind wander into the depths of her imagination until--

 

 “Katie!”

 

 “Yeah, coming!”

 

 She looked over at the clock on her nightstand. Seven fifteen. Late. She only had five minutes to get ready if she wanted to grab something to eat and just  _ barely  _ catch the bus. She leaped out of bed and practically ran over to the bathroom. She brushed her teeth at the speed of light, irritating her gums. She ran back to her room and chose the first items of clothing that she saw: a pale pink pinafore that was slightly wrinkled in some areas, a white t-shirt to wear under the pinafore, and her favorite pair of white sneakers, concealing a pair of mismatched socks. She inspected herself in the mirror as she furiously brushed through her hair, making it puff a little. There were light bags under her eyes-- not bad considering she’d slept only five hours-- and she did a good job choosing her outfit under pressure. She snatched her black kitten backpack and her phone from the floor and dashed downstairs, where she found her mom sitting at the table, drinking from her favorite mug-- #1 Mom, a gift from Matt that he bought from the dollar store because he forgot Mother’s Day.

 

 “I already packed your lunch,” she said after taking a sip of her coffee. “Peanut butter and jelly.”

 

 Katie smiled as she picked up a piece of toast and smeared it with butter. “Thanks, ma.”

 

 She took a bite out of her toast and took out her phone to check the time. Seven twenty-one.  _ Not bad, not bad at all.  _ Katie’s missed the bus twice this month, only managing to get to school on time because her mom was the most caring person on the planet and drove her, even though she’d be late for work. Usually, her dad or Matt would drive her to school, but they were kind of busy at the other side of the solar system at the moment, so she had to take the bus. 

 

 She finished her toast, grabbed an apple and her lunch, kissed her mom goodbye, and headed out for the bus stop. She could easily make it there under two minutes, so she wasn’t panicking. The neighborhood was quiet at this time of day, with the exception of a passing car every now and then. The sky was pale blue, almost the exact same shade as her walls, no clouds in sight. A clear sky would’ve stirred some sort of morale-boosting emotion for anyone else, but it made Katie strangely uneasy. She couldn’t really explain why. The sun just felt so small surrounded by the endless blue, like it was drowning in solitude. It felt abandoned, isolated, alone. It was hard to put into words, or maybe it wasn’t and she was just being stupid. 

 

 She kept walking towards the bus stop, stopping only to say hello to Mrs. Andrews and pet her dog. Once the bright yellow vehicle came into view, she sprinted towards the bus and managed to get on. She greeted the driver, Owen, breathlessly, then taking a seat besides her best friend, Dan.

 

 “Hey, Danny boy,” she said as she tugged on his earbud cord.

 

 His eyes widened in surprise and he let out a quiet yelp, which made Katie chuckle. He glared at her for a second before assuming his usual happy-go-lucky attitude.

 

 “Salut, Katie,” he said in his best-- yet abysmal-- impression of a French accent. “How are vous in this belle journée?”

 

 Katie raised an eyebrow and tried to suppress a laugh as she replied. “Hon hon hon baguette,” she practically snorted out.

 

 “Ha ha, very funny,” he said sarcastically, though she could see his scowl breaking up into a smile. Nobody could resist her comedic genius.

 

 “French test?”

 

 “Oui,” he said, defeated.

 

 “Told you to take Spanish.”

 

 “Too late now,” he said, shrugging as he put his earbuds back on.

 

 “What are you listening to?”

 

 “Um, just a french video going through the basic phrases.”

 

_ Of course. _ Dan might not have the best grades, but he’s one of the most hardworking people she knows. Taking a quick look at him, she can see the dark circles under his eyes, definitely from pulling an all-nighter. His dark brown hair was unkempt and tangled-- more than usual, anyways-- and his big green eyes were closed in an attempt to better understand whatever the lady in the video was saying. He looked miserable, which pretty much described her high school experience so far. She took out the apple she had been meaning to eat on their way to school and swung it in front of his face. He looked at it with a puzzled expression and turned his head to face Katie. She motioned for him to take the apple, as she held it out. He grabbed the apple with one hand, taking out one of his earbuds with the other.

 

 “Thanks,” he said as he took a bite.

 

 “Just doing my civic duty,” she said, smirking good-naturedly

 

 The apple was already half-eaten before he replied. “Didn’t get any breakfast today.”

 

 “Yeah. I can tell,” Katie said, trying to hide her amusement.

 

 They made it to school without further predicament. Dan was praying to any and all celestial beings to help him pass his test as he got off the bus. No lightning bolts came crashing down as a sign, but Owen wished him good luck, making Dan’s face harden with determination. Katie promised to buy him ice cream after school if he actually managed to pull it off, hoping that it would further motivate him to “conquer the fromage.” She escorted him to the French classroom, where Mrs. Gagnier looked as cold and stern as ever, holding up a stack of papers to her face. Mrs. Gagnier struck fear into the hearts of all who came across her. Katie admired those brave enough to walk into her class every day, though refused to believe they did it on their own free will. Mrs. Gagnier probably held a gun up to their heads, or just had some really embarrassing pictures of her students to use as blackmail. She was ready to perform a thorough search on Dan’s request, though he knew that if he led her on she would actually do it, so he was quick to shoot her plans down.

 

 She made it to class, where she was greeted by the warm smile of her math teacher, Mrs. Daly. Math class was uneventful: going over formulas, solving problems, listening to the cries of struggling souls-- the usual. Katie has found that everybody kind of gives up by Friday, even teachers.  Nothing interesting happened during the rest of her classes either, unless you count Ethan Foley’s “spill” as interesting. More like stupid in Katie’s book. 

 

 She didn’t see Dan again until lunch, and as soon as fifth period rolled around, she knew something was off. She saw it in his face. The pain of loss, the sorrow of failure. Dan’s face was the face of someone who had seen too much, injured by the reality of human nature. Dan had entered that classroom a boy and left a man, a scarred man. He definitely failed the test.

 

 “A sixty-three!” he said in indignation. “You’d think that she’d give me two extra points after all I studied but  _ no _ !”

 

 “Learning a new language is hard,” Katie said as she took a bite of her long-awaited peanut butter and jelly sandwich. 

 

 “You don’t get a say in this, Katie ‘Spanish maestro’ Holt.”

 

 “Your point? Last time I checked you were fluent in Spanish so don’t mess with me, mijo.”

 

 “My point is that you’re having a blast learning your third language while I’m. . .”

 

 And she lost him. Katie wondered if she should prompt him, but she knew better than that. Whatever he was going to say is now lost forever.

 

 “Why did you even take French anyway?”

 

 No answer.  _ That’s weird.  _ Dan was not the kind of person to openly ignore someone who was sitting right in front of him. His eyes seemed to wander to something behind her, so, naturally, she turned around and saw. . . Mitchell Gray?  _ Why would Dan be staring at-- oh. . . Ohhhh. . . OHHHHH.  _ She was going to get a kick out of this. Dan must’ve noticed because his eyes widened in panic, and his cheeks flared up in embarrassment.

 

 “Katie, no”

 

 “Mitchell Gray, huh?”

 

 “No, no,” he said, making gestures with his hands. “We’re not doing this. This is  _ not  _ happening.”

 

 “He takes French, does he not?” Katie prompted, no longer able to hide the smug smirk her lips were forming.

 

 “Yeah,” Dan answered more directly that she thought he would. “He is so annoying. His accent is fucking perfect, and his grammar too! How is he so good at French? Even Mrs. Gagnier likes him!” 

 

 For a moment, she thought he was going to keep going, but he must’ve realized his mistake because he instead decided to stuff his mouth with pizza.  _ This boy will be the end of me,  _ she thought contentedly. “So, you like his accent?”

 

 “Katie, no.”

 

 “Katie, yes,” she said, trying her hardest not to burst out in laughter. “You did this to yourself.”

 

 “I did,” he said, looking down at his lunch in defeat.

 

 “So you accept you have a crush on pretty boy Mitchell?”

 

 “No.”

 

 “I will actually sing the  _ Hercules  _ song right now.”

 

 “No! Don’t you dare!”

 

 “ _ Who you think you’re kidding--” _

 

__ “Please, stop.”

 

 “ _ He's the earth and heaven-- _ ”

 

 “Fine! Just stop singing!”

 

 “This is too good,” Katie said, a triumphant look on her face. “Danny boy, you just made my day.”

 

 They spent the rest of the day plotting how to get the two of them alone. Katie suggested tutoring, but Dan rejected it because his “terrible French would scare Mitchell away.” Dan seemed almost relieved to have somebody to talk about this with, he flashed a big smile every time Katie made a lighthearted joke about “Ditchell,” his cheeks reddening at the same time. The talked about it all during history (Mr. Richards showed a movie), and came to the conclusion that they’d end up with a restraining order placed on them. 

 

 After history, they had the long-awaited freshman Garrison assembly, where they would be briefed on all the benefits of attending such a prestigious academy, as well as the prerequisites, the challenges, the implications, all that junk. Katie always knew she was going to go, no matter what. Matt went, her  _ dad  _ worked there, it was pretty much decided for her, though that didn’t mean she wanted to go any less. She’d always wanted to go to space. Sci-fi movies were always her favorites, even though some of them were scientifically impossible, at least by their current technology. Katie wanted to make history, to shake humanity to the core. She had big dreams, and she was committed to making them come true.

 

 The Class of 2090 sat in uniform rows of chairs, patiently waiting for what the assembly would hold. Whispers could be heard from all corners of the assembly room. 

 

_ “Do you think an actual space explorer is going to come?” _

_ “This is going to be so cool!”  _

_ “I’m just here for the aliens.” _

_ “The Galaxy Garrison is actually Area 51. Fight me.” _

_ “Who do you think is actually going to get in?” _

_ “Katie Holt, definitely” _

 

__ Katie felt herself swell with pride, but snapped herself out of it. Her dad always reminded her to stay humble, no matter how smart she was or how many prizes she won. It was nice being respected for your smarts rather than other things, though it was annoying that people asked her for homework every day, sometimes more than once. She was the top student in her class, and she worked hard to keep it that way, not for the glory, but for herself, and other people seemed to recognize that.

 

 The principal, Mrs. Rhodes, walked up to the little stage. Everyone looked up in anticipation as the short and stout woman cleared her throat and took out a piece of paper from the right pocket of her blazer. Her voice was sweet and mellow, and felt odd coming out from such an austere lady.

 

 “As you are well aware of, you have finally reached the age when you will be able to enlist in the Galaxy Garrison, a school dedicated to producing the next generation of elite astroexplorers.

 

 “Please, pay attention to the following video presentation, which will go over everything you need to know before making this great decision.”

 

 A few disappointed ‘aw’s were heard around the room after the word “video,” but most students watched intently as the Garrison logo appeared on the holographic screen. Katie had already seen this recruitment video. She’d probably seen it hundreds of times on the Internet, just waiting for the day she would actually go. She watched as the familiar face of Shiro appeared on the screen, fierce determination in his eyes, as if he was going to convince the President of the United States to join the ranks at the Garrison. Video Shiro then proceeded to make his usual wise, old sensei speech about responsibilities, and duty, and bravery, and the wise stuff that he’s probably not qualified to talk about. Every time she watches the video, she can’t help but think of the time Shiro chugged a 2 liter bottle of Coca-Cola on a dare and vomited all over the table. Matt and he then rushed to dispose of the evidence before her parents got home. They were supposed to be babysitting her. 

 

 The video showed various facilities within the Garrison, explained the different fields of study offered at the Garrison, listed the accomplishments achieved by the Garrison specialists, and even had interviews with former students, among them Matt. Fortunately, everyone in Katie’s vicinity turned their heads to inform her, otherwise she might have mistaken him for a different Matthew Holt. The recruitment video ended with a quick word from the head of the Garrison, Commander Iverson, then the Garrison logo.

 

 The room buzzed with excitement. Whispers arose from all corners of the assembly room. Dan gave Katie a tentative smile before diving back into his book. He was studying for his next French test early. Katie could hear comments about her from the kids in the row behind her, but she chose to ignore them. She knew who was sitting behind her: Juliette Manson and her cronies. They were never openly mean to her, but she didn’t want them to, so she mostly ignored them. Those girls could spread gossip about you faster than Dan could eat a taco-- alarmingly fast-- so it was wiser to steer clear. 

 

 Once they were out of the assembly room, Katie was bombarded with questions about the Garrison. 

 

 “Hey, Katie! Do you know Takashi Shirogane?” asked Will Davis.

 

 “Yeah,” Katie said, throwing Dan a pleading look.

 

 “R.I.P,” Dan said loud enough so only Katie could hear.

 

 “Wow! That’s so cool!” Mitchell Gray said as he exchanged excited glances with Will. “What is he like?”

 

 “A bit of a loser, really.”

 

 Shiro did not deserve that. There’s no denying he is a mess-- he’s said it so himself, multiple times-- but he always manages to pull through, which is very admirable. He’s also an amazing pilot, which is why he got assigned to the Kerberos Mission with Matt and her dad. She has no idea how Shiro and Matt became friends, but she does know that together they are a destructive force that cannot be contained. Why the Garrison assigned them together to a mission to the edge of the solar system is beyond her. Shiro is probably going to crash because Matt made a joke about peas or something, and they’re going to die. Her body rejected the idea, chills ran through her body as she tried not to think about. . . that. They were fine, right?

 

 “Aw, come on!” Mitchell Gray snapped her out of her thoughts. “He can’t be all that bad.” She was suddenly aware of her surroundings again. More people were standing around her, probably waiting for some mind-blowing story about Shiro and his heroics. Her eyes searched for Dan, and found him nose-deep into his book, as if he could disappear into it. Then she realized Mitchell Gray was standing right next to him, their shoulders almost touching, and sighed.  

 

 “He’s not a bad person, he’s actually really nice,” Katie said, hoping the crowd would magically disperse. “But he’s just a normal person like the rest of us.”

 

 “Yeah, but he flies into space,” Will Davis said, and she had the strong urge to roll her eyes. “That’s not normal.”

 

 “Plenty of people have flown into space over the past fifty years,” Katie said, taking her phone out of her backpack to check the time. “Shiro’s just flown the farthest.”

 

 “Wow, you call him Shiro?”

 

 “Is that his nickname?” Will Davis said, and the urge to roll her eyes intensified.

 

 “Of course that’s his nickname,” Dan said, to Katie’s surprise. “Come on, Katie. We’re going to miss the bus.”

 

 Katie followed Dan out of the crowd, people whispering as they passed. They power walked to where their bus was parked and sat on their usual spot, Katie taking the window seat this time. Dan opened the big pocket of his backpack and put away his book. Owen announced that the “bus was leaving the station,” as he always did and the bus began moving. The school shrinked from view as they made their way to their homes. The sky seemed darker than it was in the morning, and Katie was relieved to see some clouds floating around keeping the sun company. 

 

 “What you thinking about?” Dan said, tying his shoelaces.

 

 “Nothing in particular. What about you?”

 

 “I’m thinking of moving to France, studying there for a couple of years, then coming back--”

 

 “And winning over Mitchell Gray.”

 

 “--and hitting Mrs. Gagnier with a baguette,” Dan finished his sentence, raising an eyebrow at Katie’s comment. “You know, I don’t think about Mitchell Gray all the time.”

 

 “Yeah, yeah,” Katie said, laughing a little.

 

 “But I guess that’s better than hitting Mrs. Gagnier with a baguette.”

 

 “Yeah, a waste of good bread.”

 

 They talked and laughed, as they always did on their way back from school, yet this time it felt different, as if they’d become closer over the last six hours. She’d never been a social butterfly, large crowds made her nervous, strangers were dangerous, and family gatherings usually made her cry. Socializing was hard for her, but not with Dan. He was part of the handful of people she was comfortable with. So I guess she could say that Dan was like a brother to her, especially now that Matt was in space. Teasing Dan felt as natural, though, and it distracted her from worrying about her father and brother all the time.

 

 The bus pulled up on Katie’s neighborhood, and Owen opened the doors. Katie said her goodbyes to Dan in English, Spanish, Italian, and, to his dismay, French. She was snickering as she got off the bus, thanking Owen before he closed the doors, and waving at Dan as he looked out the window. She watched the big, yellow bus drive into the distance. Walking back to her house, she stopped at Mrs. Andrews, who was still sitting out on her porch, her dog, Pidge, sleeping on her lap.  _ Had she been sitting there all day? _

 

 “Hello, Mrs. Andrews. How’s everything?” Katie said, making Pidge’s fluffy ears perk up.

 

 “Oh, good, dear. It’s nice to see you,” Mrs. Andrews said, her lips curling into a smile. Mrs. Andrews was your stereotypical wise, old lady. Wispy, white hair framed her delicate features, wrinkles outlined almost every corner of her pale face, veiny hands reaching for her walking stick. Pidge jumped from her lap and ran to greet Katie, wagging her little tail, and jumping up and down, running circles around her. 

 

 “Hey, Pidge!” Katie said, patting the Cocker Spaniel’s head. She focused her attention on Mrs. Andrews. “Do you need any help?”

 

 “That would be nice,” said Mrs. Andrews, one hand gripping her walking stick, the other using her rocking chair’s armrest for support. Katie walked up the small set of stairs up to the porch and helped Mrs. Andrews to her living room. Stacks of boxes, big and small, sat where the couch once was.

 

 “Thank you for helping, dear,” Mrs. Andrews said, sitting down in a chair next to a small box with the word “memories” written in black marker. “I’m not as young as I used to be.”

 

 “What’s with all the boxes?” Katie asked, knowing the answer.

 

 Mrs. Andrews sighed. “I’m headed to a retirement home, a new chapter, they say, though I have a feeling it will be the last.” Pidge curled up at the feet of her owner and whimpered as if she understood the conversation.

 

 “Don’t say that, Mrs. Andrews,” Katie said, trying not to let emotions get the best of her. “I’m sure it’ll be nice.”

 

 “I know, I know,” said Mrs. Andrews, smiling. “That’s the depression talking again.” She said this so casually that Katie wasn’t sure if to take it as a joke or not. Mrs. Andrews had always been the sarcastic one, keeping Mr. Andrews on his toes. Katie had learned most of her sass from her. After Mr. Andrews died, though, her jokes and snarky remarks became less common, so she wasn’t all that sure anymore.

 

 Katie decided to stay away from the topic. “What’s in that box?” she said, pointing at the “memories” box.

 

 “Oh, these? These are things from when I was your age,” said Mrs. Andrews, brown eyes suddenly bright with excitement.

 

 “Can I see them?” Katie said, though Mrs. Andrews was already starting to open the little box.

 

 She took out a galaxy patterned artifact-- a toy, probably-- divided in three sections that spun when Mrs. Andrews held her thumb to the center. “This”-- she sighed-- “is a fidget spinner, dear.”  

 

 “Fidget spinner?”

 

 “Ah, yes. One of the stupidest trends I have lived through.”

 

 “Worse than the screaming shoes from last year?”

 

 “Yes, worse than screaming shoes”-- Mrs. Andrews laughed-- “My best friend gave it to me for my fifteenth birthday, and, let’s say, I was underwhelmed. Though I often spun it ‘ironically’”

 

 Katie spent the rest of the day listening to Mrs. Andrews tales. She told of the horrors of freshman year, of old memes long-forgotten, of the Death of Vine, and something about sporks. It never ceases to surprise her, how Mrs. Andrews remembers everything so vividly, so clearly, and how happy she is as she tells her stories. Katie loved being at Mrs. Andrews, it was like stepping into a different reality, another world. She then realized how much she was going to miss Mrs. Andrews. Hatred bubbled in her stomach, making her sick. Hate directed at Mrs. Andrews’ son and daughter, who would abandon such a good, wholesome person. She knew Mr. and Mrs. Andrews had been at odds with their children for a couple of years, not wanting to live the rest of their lives isolated from the rest of the world. I guess Mrs. Andrews lost that fight, as well as her partner. 

 

 Katie smiled at Mrs. Andrews. It was really all she could do. She was not a part of her family, she was just a neighbor. She had no say in this. The only thing she can do is make her feel wanted and loved. Katie can only tell her, through tears and broken sobs, that she was like a second grandmother to her, and that she cherished all the moments they had shared together. She promised she would call, visit, send her pictures, update her on neighborhood affairs, etc. That was all she could do. Katie felt her frail, bony hands on her back as they hugged for the last time, and her teary, wistful eyes on her as she walked out the door, saying her last goodbyes to Pidge, the old Cocker Spaniel that had convinced her mother to adopt Bae Bae. 

 

 She ran to her house, leaving all emotions behind. She hoped to make it home before her mom did, but she knew she wouldn’t be that lucky. Her mother usually made it home by six thirty, and it was almost seven o’clock. She was surprised to see her mother out on the driveway, though, unloading groceries.

 

 “There you are!” her mother said. “Would you help me with the groceries?”

 

 Katie nodded, grabbing a few items and carrying them inside, placing them neatly on the counter. She dropped her bag on the floor, and walked towards the door to get more items, only to see her mom, arms full of groceries, standing outside the see-through door, begging for someone to open it. Katie rushed to her mom’s rescue and opened the door as fast as she could, grabbing some of the items from her hands, and following her to the kitchen, ready to catch any flying vegetables.

 

 Once all the groceries were put away, Colleen watched as her daughter ran up the stairs to clean herself up. She could tell that something was off, but decided it would be discussed over dinner. Katie went straight to her room, taking out a small box from her cute kitten backpack. She stared at the box for about thirty seconds, then placed it up on her desk. She made her way to the bathroom to shower off the day’s events. Today had been a very strange day. It was well-balanced, she thought. On one hand, she was happy for Dan, on the other, sad for Mrs. Andrews. The excitement and mild annoyance from the Garrison assembly seeped through her fingers. She got out of the shower and slipped on her blue pyjamas, tying her hair in a side ponytail. 

 

 The first few weeks after the Kerberos launch, dinners felt incomplete. Katie’s eyes would flicker to where Matt and her dad would be, and she knew her mom did the same. Every day, a part of her hoped that Matt and her father would be waiting for her when she came downstairs, and every day she was bitterly disappointed. Five months later, she still hasn’t gotten used to their absence. They never told her the exact date they would be returning apart from the vague answer of “in a few months.” 

 

 She took a deep breath before going downstairs.  _ Maybe,  _ she thought. She walked down the stairs slowly, trying to listen for extra voices. Her mother called, announcing that dinner was ready, and she knew it was another “normal” day.

 

 “Hi, sweetie,” Colleen said as Katie sat down on her seat. “How was your day?”

 

 “Pretty good,” Katie said halfheartedly, picking at her food.

 

 “Did you hear about Mrs. Andrews?”

 

 Katie nodded. It was amazing how her mother always knew everything, all the time. There must be a science behind it, the mother sixth sense. They didn’t talk much after that. Katie finished her plate and excused herself before her mother could think of what to say. 

 

 Katie dashed for her room and closed the door behind her. She walked over to her desk and looked at the items inside Mrs. Andrews box: the fidget spinner, a pair of eclipse glasses, an iPhone 8, and some old meme posters. She laughed as she went through the posters, putting them up one at a time on the only empty wall space she had. Once she was done, she took a picture to send to Mrs. Andrews once she was in the retirement home. She looked over to her clock which merrily proclaimed that it was nine o’clock. It was then she realized just how tired she was. She had barely gotten any sleep last night, and the excitement of the day was starting to catch up to her. She yawned two times before deciding to go to bed.

 

 She went through her nighttime routine, brushing her teeth, washing her face, etc. Katie could hear the television on; her mother was probably watching the news. Katie began walking down the stairs, to wish her mom a good night, and to reassure her that she was okay. She was halfway down the stairs when she heard a word that made all the little hairs in the back of her neck stand up: Kerberos. A woman, no more than thirty years old was talking, her voice loud and clear, devoid of emotion.

 

 “The Galaxy Garrison mission to the distant moon of Kerberos is missing, and all crew members are believed to be dead--”

 

She kept walking down the stairs instinctively, just to get a better look, and, sure enough, the video of the launch was on screen, right and center.  _ Did she say dead? Dead? No, this is not happening. This is not real. This is not happening.  _ The images of Takashi Shirogane, Samuel Holt, and Matthew Holt blurred from view, replaced by blotches of color. Her mind was spiraling out of control. So many questions, so many emotions. It all came too fast, too much.

 

“--The Galaxy Garrison has said the crash was presumably caused by pilot error--”

 

 Colleen stood there, hand pressed to her chest, eyes aching with tears she did not want to shed. Her husband, her baby boy, gone. Gone. It left a bitter taste in her mouth. She and Samuel had gone over this before, what she would do if something happened to him in space, but, it had never felt real to her. It was all just hypothetical, a theory. Now she felt as if reality hit her in the face with a cinder block. Her knees were beginning to wobble, her hands began to shake. Her loving husband, her sweet baby boy, gone.

 

“--It is, indeed, a sad day for all humanity.”

 

 Katie wanted to yell, to scream, to throw something at the TV, something, but nothing could come close to express the sorrow, and the grief she was experiencing. Tears threatened to spill out from her eyes, yet they never ran down her cheeks. The Garrison. This was all their fault. They tore this family apart. They never even bothered to send a message, a letter, not even a phone call. Nothing. Why wouldn’t they? Her brow furrowed at the thought.  _ They are hiding something. _

 

 Katie was glued to the spot. She physically could not move, and neither could Colleen. They both stood there, struggling to breathe, to think. The news lady moved on to another story, but they still stood there, the woman’s voice still ringing in their ears. . .  _ all crew members are believed to be dead. . . a sad day for all humanity. _

 

__ Katie wanted to say something, to hug her mom, to just do anything at all. She would offer everything she had to just have Matt and her papa safe, home. She would go anywhere, do anything, just to know they were alive and well. She prayed to God, tears finally rolling down her cheeks. She wanted her family, whole and happy. They were not dead, they could not be dead.  _ No. God, please, no. _

 

__ She felt something stir inside her. This was not over. The Garrison was hiding something, she knew it. She just knew. She ran up the stairs, the sound breaking the silence. The noise snapped Colleen from her thoughts, but Katie was gone before she could turn around. Colleen tried. She tried so hard to move, to go after her daughter, to comfort her, but her legs wouldn’t move. She fell. She fell on her knees and let herself grieve.

 

 Katie made it to the room, slammed the door, locked it, and opened her laptop. The Kerberos Mission was the top trending topic, because of course it was, so it wasn’t hard for her to find a lengthy article about the crash to start her search. She watched videos, read conspiracy theories, did background searches on everyone who was in any way associated with the Kerberos Mission, she did it all. She read it all. There was nothing she could use to incriminate the Garrison. She cursed, she yelled out curse words that she had never used, and the more she cursed the more she cried. She fell on the floor, curled up into a ball, and cried herself to sleep.  

 

_ This is what you’ve left behind. _

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. Thank you for reading. Yes, you. Thank you. <3  
> 2\. If you enjoyed this little thing I wrote, tell me your favorite part in the comments (or leave a kudos if you want ;))  
> 3\. Suggestions!! yes, I love those  
> 4\. If you guys really like this fic, I'll write more chapters!! Just say the word
> 
> yeah I think that's it
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> for now  
> lolz bai


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